February 25th, 2016

February 25th, 2016

7:58 am

Let me tell you, if you ever need to clean out your system I have a fruit snack for you that'll empty you out faster'n anything- I ate some yesterday morning and naturally my stomache was bothering me from about 4pm on... but now I used the fruit snacks strategically, ate some before bed, let nature take its course in the morning. Okay, you aren't interested in this.

I arrived at work right on the 1pm buzzer- I had plenty of time to walk down, but it seems I was meandering a bit, having too nice a time, because I looked at my clock and found I had less than three minutes to get there and I was still outside across from the plaza- whoops! I ran for it and just got in during the 1 pm minute. I'm still kind of sick, so I didn't want to be running, but I really didn't want to be late.

As soon as I arrived and got my papers together, Ivy came over and asked if I had had lunch yet- I hadn't, but I wasn't really planning on getting anything then. Since she asked, I went and picked up some tomato soup and, to thank her for coffee from the day before, bought her lunch, which was some tapioca looking egg in a plastic container, and corn on the cob- she impaled the cob with a chopstick, effecient. I didn't stay much longer after I finished my soup, I had to much to prepare- I didn't even have time to reply to any messages on facebook yesterday, let alone send my latest block of blog posts. I saw there's a small kerfuffle over my posting an article denouncing the radical left or radical socialist or however the article was titled, with the chief concern being that trigger warnings are too a good thing- which both completely misses the point of the article and in part demonstrates what the article was about. A moderately interesting turn of affairs. I obviously won't name names, but a friend messaged me to tell me he also agreed with the article, but didn't want to like/share/comment for fear of the eventual blowback from the people the article was criticizing... which is also demonstrative of the kind of social censorship the article discusses, hampering a free exchange of ideas. Well, anyways, maybe you don't care about this either.

My first class was a salon- large group discussion- that required me to cut out a number of slips of paper. Annoying and it takes a lot of time- part of the reason I left Ivy so quickly- however once I saw the class list was only one person, Lydian, the boss' wife I recalled running through that lesson with her before. I checked with her before asking for the next lesson plan in the sequence, this one titled "Staying Healthy". Then I spent my time reviewing Hamlet, looking up unfamiliar words ("jocund") until classes began.

As usual, Lydian and I mostly just chatted- for the purposes of the "Staying Healthy" topic I went into great detail about my work out routine here in China, and we talked about "metabolic rate", "six pack/pac", aerobic vs. anaerobic exercise, calf muscle, abdominal, oblique, all sorts of fun stuff. By the end she said I should talk to Leo about exercise stuff (I've mostly restricted myself to discussing healthy food in China) and I disagreed for two reasons- when people look at me they don't see an exercise guy ("YOU worked security?" is a common phrase I hear) and, I think for Leo, being the office's "Exercise Guy" is part of his identity, and so a part of him would feel I was a) presumptive in talking about exercise, as though I knew something about it or something and b) hey, this guy is horning in on my racket!

I said, "I don't mind being "Hamlet Guy"- I like "Hamlet Guy"!"

Speaking of which, next was my English Corner, and it was a disaster- it took a while to plug in because I'm an idiot, and, great, I reviewed the upcoming section of the play for difficult words, but I didn't review it for interesting content: we only got through the section where Horatio shows up and tells Hamlet about the ghost... so after I started the presentation with a reminder of what has gone on before in the play, everything else we covered in today was... a reminder of what went on before in the play. Ugh. And to top it off, I finished the scene with 6 or 7 minutes left in the English Corner- I wasn't going to start scene 3 that late, so I had to dangle in the wind for those last minutes. Brutal.

For today I'm going to try and come up with something else for my English Corner, they look like they need a break from Shakespeare.

Bradley came over and wanted to talk, which I was more than glad to do, and then Ivy came over to talk, so I said "we could all talk together"- a nice, platonic group of friends talking talking talking. 

My stomach started really hurting at this point, even while I started feeling tired, like maybe the medicines I had taken that morning decided now was the time to make me drowsy- I was a crumpled mess sitting in my chair listening to Bradley- but then he wanted to talk about what is design, and what is art, and I felt more energy about these topics and started lecturing a bit about the Romantics and Keats, because I always think of Keats. Er, when I'm not confusing him with Yeats.

Bradley suggested getting food, and Ivy didn't want to join us- while eating I confided in Bradley that I was worried Ivy may have seen my earlier interactions as romantic and he replied with his trademark phrasing of "don't worry about it" like my own little Michelle Tanner. You know, "you got it, dude"- come on, I hate Full House, but everyone knows that line.

Well, I mean, nobody hates Stamos, obviously.

Next class was about role models, a salon class, starring this guy Bale, Ivy, Rae, (guy)Sunny, Mandy, Amaris, and Diane. Amaris very strongly asserted that since turning 18 she makes her own decisions and has no outside influence, greatest or otherwise. Fine by me, I'm not here to argue- er, not that she was arguing. A lot of parents as role models, Sunny said David Beckham because of his good looks (great role model...) and because of his ability on the football field (okay, that's better). Once again, my role model is Spider-Man.

Then I talked about the Environment and social problems with Leon, May, and Kee Kee- apparently it's a thing here where doctors blackmail a patient's family for money, or else they won't do their best with the whole "surgery" thing. Yikes! More like the Hypocritical Oath- zing!

But actually that's terrifying news. Apparently it's getting better?

I also made a risky move in that I decided to be cheeky and write "patience" on the board to see if anyone would call me out on misspelling "patients"- and they all looked at me weird, and Leon said it was spelled wrong- good! It's of course a risky move because they may just think I'm covering for myself after the fact, and didn't consciously decide to test them. Maybe this post is me covering for myself even more- they learn English, find my blog, read this and think "wow, genius, he was testing me all those times he made mistakes!"

My plan is working perfectly.

Finally there was a beginner salon about describing things with Daniel and Vic, who I've definitely taught before, Linda who I think I've taught before, and Laurence and Shally who are new to me- I asked for the alphabet, and as it was spoken to me I wrote it on the board- G vs. J, tough to differentiate the sounds- but that wasn't the tough part, they could all do that- next I needed an adjective for each letter of the alphabet- I blanked on K, X, and Z myself, so that's unfortunate. Got any suggestions?

That's basically what we did for the entire class- not all about the alphabet, but I'd pick a word, split the class into two teams, and give them two minutes to come up with all the adjectives they could. We also had an exercise where we had to "sell" something- come up with good adjectives for something and sell it to our partner.

Meanwhile, a book has been sitting on the table here since my class on role models- turns out to belong to Ivy (I thought so)- I got Adeel to send her the message that it's in the desk drawer here at Web.

And that was my day man- I went home and ate all the rest of the cheap baked goods I picked up the day before, as well as a bunch more of those fruit snacks that were vehemently opposed to remaining in my body any longer than they had to. Had some medicine. Went to bed. Good stuff. - 9:51 am