February 16th, 2016

9:42 am

Among a night filled with crazy dreams, at one point I was asking Jordan to pass me this book over to the right- I'm pointing right- and Jordan picks up a book on the left side of the room. While I reach over to grab this different book  I mention that wasn't at all the book I was pointing to, and then Jordan immediately turns away to put this book down and get the first one. Jordan! I was taking that one, outstretched hand and everything!

It was a classic Jordan move. Hi, Jordan!

I also dreamed I was giving a speech at a friend's father's remembrance service, like it was an anniversary service of the funeral or somthing. (This particular friend's father is still alive) I was trying to say something meaningful, but this one kid was slamming loudly on an organ and interrupting. I woke up today to the sound of that "organ'- more fireworks outside. Come on with this!

Anyways, let's talk about yesterday, it was a full day, I may not finish it before I have to leave for work.

So yes, yesterday was another morning with a firework wake up call, this has become a pattern. What I WANT to be a pattern is me doing my exercises- I didn't feel like doing them, but I got through them.

The weather outside is warm enough, sun shiny enough (yesterday, and today have been gorgeous mornings to look out my window and see) for there to be a lot of melting water running down the street- but the "sidewalks" are still precariously icy.

I went to the grocery store connected to my apartment building, and was followed all throughout the fruits and vegetable section by a guy who didn't speak English. He was friendly enough, but as he wasn't capable of really selling to me I assume he just wanted to make sure I didn't steal anything, which is fair enough. I closely examined the junkier food section, and ended up grabbing some banana chips, some "bread bean", and a package of some kind of soft candy- all coming to 9.5 yuan, and a free plastic bag to hold it all in. Nice. They really were very friendly inside.

Taking my 3DS with me I visited Electronic City- I showed a woman Leo's note, and she immediately walked me to the booth I saw during my last visit here that had all video game stuff. There were three sales people standing there all working in concert as a single entity- the negotiator with the calculator and change purse, the grunt, and the spectator- they shook their heads about a USB charger, but they had an actual wall charger that worked for Nintendo products, 30 yuan. This was acceptable to me, though a bit more than I wanted to spend- and maybe I could have haggled, but it was worth it- but I motioned my money forward and then back to the grunt, saying that I wanted to see if it worked first. It took a second, but the guy then said "A test!" Yes, exactly. He plugged in, the charge light appeared, good enough for me. Sold.

As a quick aside, I had my 3DS turned on so that it used a little power before I went to get a charge test, and I ended up leaving it on for the whole day. And I didn't get a single street pass. This most certainly isn't Japan (Wait, what? It isn't? Where am I?).

I met Tina just outside Food Bazzar, who was surprised I was there on my day off, and asked why didn't I cook at home- I explained the situation of my kitchen. "Ah, you have nothing." Harsh, but acurate.

Picked up the 15 yuan combo, but the meat thing had a not-bone-but something getting in the way toughness I had to pick out of my mouth. Also, bone. I hate doing that. If someone told me that was the only reason they became a vegetarian I'd be like "I get it".

Saw Sylar and invited him to join me- he did, but was a little reluctant because he's sick. He tried to give me subway directions to the place I was teaching at the next day, but every map he showed me on his phone was just a list of chinese characters. It wasn't helpful, but at least he confirmed where the 405 bus was.

Briefly considering stopping in at Web, but decided to let them think I had a life. I gingerly picked my way through the slush and ice and got to the 405 bus. Waiting for the first, overly crowded bus to pass, I got a sweet seat on a nearly empty transport, and counted the 6 stops until I was supposed to get off.

Stop 6 was the end of the line, just outside Zhongshan Square. This can't be right.

I almost immediately get mad about the absolutely inadequate directions Vicky gave me- it's one thing if they worked out perfectly, but once you get there and they totally fail you... ooh I was fuming. Here are the instructions as originally presented:

"No. 405 to qing ni wa qiao 

go along the road there is a hotel

the center is on the first floor"

And only after she gave me these instructions did I ask for, um, how many stops am I waiting on this bus?, and so I also had written "count 6 stops after I get on"

There's also some Chinese written in black pen at the bottom, I forget what that was about, but I can tell you, after showing these instructions to a number of people on my way to this Web International location that it wasn't helpful to this situation.

I'm mentally cursing about the whole thing- "along the road"? Which way is "along the road"? There's a hotel? What's the name of the hotel? What is the name of the street this place is supposed to be on, let alone any intersection or house number (I can't read building numbers here anyway).

Going back to the bus, I asked the driver about "qing ni wa qiao" by showing him the paper- he immediately gave up on helping me because of the language barrier, but pointed me to a woman in a booth just outside, maybe a ticket agent. She ALSO almost immediately dismisses me as unhelpable, but then she sees "qing ni wa qiao" and points in a direction. THANK YOU that's all I wanted. 

She pointed back the way I came, so I decided to trace the buses path, guessing that the "6 stops" thing was a gross over-estimation, and, in a tucked away corner, I found a DVD and record shop. I browse here for a while, and end up getting two movies, 10 yuan each- Trumbo and The Hateful Eight before asking the guy with the translating (I see I've maybe slightly changed my tense usage in this past sentence? Were this to be graded I'd get another red penned TENSE written over the section, I think. Did it stick out as weird to you? Or does it stick out when I do this in other areas? If my red pen filled history is any indication, I do this a lot.) device about "qing ni wa qiao". He walks out the door and points at a building on the other side of the rounabout we're standing at. I thank him, and head in that direction, taking an underground path that connects one side of the roundabout to the other- I emerge and look back where I came from. The DVD shop looks very far away, but I've got my barings. (barrings? "bear"ings?... given the options, I think I spelled it correctly on the first go)

The building that I was pointing at is across the street, but even assuming that THAT is "qing ni wa qiao", remember, the instruction don't actually tell me to go there, but to "go along the road" from there. At this point I'm on the south side of Zhongshan Lu, which is great, because I'm familiar with Zhongshan, you'll recall I've explored there before. But the sidewalk, and there is a sidewalk here, there's a rail that makes it impossible for cars to park here, is all ice. I have to penguin walk everywhere, or near enough. I get to another cross walk that's barred off- I have to take another underground path to cross the street. 

But this path is connected to an immense underground plaza. I emerge on the other side of the street- I ended up on the north side of Zhongshan when I was looking to just get on the further west side of the street, staying on the south. Written above the entrance on this north side is "Victory Plaza"- I think I mentioned seeing that place on my last Zhongshan excursion, but I didn't check it out then. I took some pictures of the sign, the twing dragons on the back, the giant saxophone statue, that sort of stuff. Er, okay, that was everything I took a picture of right then.

Speaking of my past Zhongshan excursion, I remembered passing A Web International on that trip, though I couldn't remember for sure if it was on Zhongshan or Huanghe- I thought the latter. I walk north, above ground, tip toe sliding on the ice (again, this place is a death trap) to find that this road is where a train station is. Good to know. But it also wasn't Huanghe like I thought.

I'm fuming mad at this point, and decided to just walk to Web at Roosevelt and get some decent directions... but behind me to the east there ARE two hotels (so mad the hotel wasn't named, if there's one hotel there're always more grouped together..) so I ACTUALLY decide to turn around and give another search. I'm stubborn.

Back across the ice, I get a green light to cross- so something like four taxis make right turns and completely block me off. Man I hate the drivers here. Hate is a strong word. But they're all dicks, like, what? Come on.

This first hotel didn't have any signs of having an English language center on its first floor, or even any kind of entrance. Just a lone guard (doorman?) standing outside. I considered asking how to get inside, but moved on instead.

On my way to the next hotel I detoured for the sake of thoroughness to "Kaisa Plaza", a fairly upscale mall with what looked like a very slippery revolving door entrance. I was worried about slipping halfway through and dying stuck inside a revolving door. I let a wave of people pass me and use the door- how are they having no difficulty getting traction on the ground? I lift up my foot to have a peek- yeah, okay, my bottoms are worn pretty smooth, that makes sense.

I suck it up and go through the door, again wandering around looking for signs of an English language center. I find a celebratory uh, new years tunnel that was shaped like a caterpillar but with no face, which makes sense, because if it HAD a face, then it IS a caterpillar, and that means the entrance is the caterpillars butt. And that would be weird. I took out my smartphone, removing the carrying case that slightly obscures the camera and recorded myself going through the tunnel- I have a few videos at this point that you'll be happy to see once I figure out how I should share them. Suggestions are welcomed.

There's a place called Koala Education- it seems to be like a pre-school, or something to give rich kids a leg up, eduction-wise. It isn't an English school, but I thought, hey, educators of one stripe or another, they've maybe heard of Web. So the two girls at the front desk, who were excited to help me- they were likely bored, the place was empty- spoke no English themselves, but had a supervisor or something that did. They were a little confused about Web, but then went "ah, Webbu" which, I mean, that's hilarious, right? Like, that sounded like a charicature of the Japanese language, and it's coming from a) the real world and b) a Chinese person.

Not that I don't already have plenty of anecdotal evidence to support this, but man, the Chinese language must require you to be extremely precise in your pronounciation. Which leads to a huge amount of cognitive dissonance when you think about how long I've spent trying to get them to hear how, when I say "usually" it sounds different then when they say "u-ally".

So they looked it up on their phones, because of course they did, and first said it was too far to walk to- at that I was afraid they were referring to the Roosevelt location, so I made it clear that I usually (I tried to mix it up and use the word "ordinarilly" but I clearly don't know how that is spelled- I want some internet for spell checking) work at Roosevelt. But no, they were talking about another location, they even drew me a quick map to the place, saying I had to go to the ball- there's a ball statue at the roundabout and take a right, and the Web location was down that street on the left side. I said that was great, thanks, I'm familiar with the roundabout  (okay, I said "I know the ball thing") but... on this map, which way is north?

The three sort of look at me for a second, then say "go to the ball, then turn right".

I feel like I'm taking crazy pills- guys, if you don't know which way is north, that's fine, not everyone does, that's okay. If you don't understand what I mean when I say the word "north" that's also understandable... but skipping over what I said like I didn't say it is so messed up.

So two of the women decide to walk me to the exit to point out the ball thing, which, again, finding the ball was not an issue. It's a giant ball, visible from the door. Even if I hadn't been wandering in the area for the past hour+, I'd have found it fine. However, once outside one of the women did take my map and turn it so there was a clear orientation for how the map overlayed with the streets ahead. 

Which was streets ahead! And if you don't get that then you're streets behind.

The women did also make it clear that the Web location was on Zhongshan Lu- so that must be the location I've seen before.. I had to assume that couldn't be the place I was supposed to go to, otherwise why wouldn't Vicki mention "oh, it's on Zhongshan Lu and is incredibly easy to find" but I could walk over there easily enough and get directions to the REAL place I was supposed to go to the next day. Well, let me cut ahead, that Zhongshan location IS where I'm going today to teach, and there's no hotel connected to it.

Wh-AT!?!

It's also right next to a subway station for incredibly easy access.

The door is something you have to slide to open, like I'm entering someone's house from their backyard- but it isn't that weird, plenty of places have entrances like this, I've just never had to use one- and then there's a pull door that's broken such that you could push or pull however you'd like. Unless it's not broken and the pull sign is the mistake...

So the reception people were slightly freaked out by a stranger showing up in the middle of the school day - "are you a teacher?" Yes. I show them my schedule which has the name of the school on it, and they confirm that THIS is the place. I'm teaching here tomorrow. "Why are you here today?" Because I wanted to make sure I could find it.

They basically looked at me like I must be crazy.

My entrance even disrupted a nearby presentation that Tyler was giving- I had to wave to him to keep presenting instead of coming over to talk to me. I was shown to the teachers area and given a seat when, really, I was good, I could leave now, but at this point I figured I should wait the 7 or so minutes for Tyler to finish his presentation and we could touch base. I pointed to my picture on the wall of employees at Web like "see? Teacher? At Web? Real thing." I was even wearing the same shirt.

I met Shane, older than me, with a prominent forehead, from... the UK? I forget. He was friendly and recounted his recent vacation and how he was lucky to get back before the rough weather blew in.

I have more to get to, but it's 11:41 am and I need to get ready for work- it's a little further than I'm used to, but thanks to all my preparation (re: the entire post thus far) I should get there with no trouble. Something I will get to is mentioning getting power to my water heater... so I'm about to try, fingers crossed, for my first warm shower in over a month. 

Some surprising temperature changes in both directions aside, it was wonderful. It'll be too bad about losing my newfound "taking cold showers" superpower, but, eh, I'd rather have the power to not dread a morning shower.

Tyler said it takes 15 minutes by subway to get to this Web location, and I've got just over 45 minutes. Doable? We'll see! 12:13pm

8 am the next morning, I was too tired to keep writing last night

After I left this Web Center I explored Victory Plaza some more- I found another DVD place, it charged 20 yuan for movies, but it also had an old Kamen Rider movie which I almost bought just so I could say I owned a Kamen Rider movie- in the back of my mind I was thinking I'd work my way back to the Koala Education place and thank the people there for getting me where I wanted to go, but by the time I emerged from the plaza and I found I wasn't anywhere near Kaisa I was too tired, and hopped on the subway to go home.

It must have been about 5:30 or 6, and the subway was packed. I let the first train go by, crammed as it was, and took the second, marginally less crammed. The trains aren't as frequent here as back in Toronto, so while waiting I took a package of "bread bean" out of my backpack and gave it a try. The first taste was disgusting, but it quickly grew to acceptable. I almost forgot about eating that snack at that moment, but I just ate another package of "bread bean" and it readily reminded me. Despite the less crowded second subway, I was still crunched up against everyone, holding onto the pole by my fingertips. Those five stops took forever. But as I got to the interchange (that sounds weird... is that a real word?) the subway ride north from Xi'an Lu was much nicer, I didn't have a crowd to contend with at all. 

Instead, I was wrestling with which stop was my exit, I couldn't remember if it was the second or third stop after Xi'an Lu. This is important since whichever I chose is where my subway ticket will open the gate and let me out- I can't just get out anywhere. I ended up going to the third subway stop and the exit worked, so I must have indeed picked that subway station when I initially bought my ticket.

Only problem was this wasn't my apartment building outside, and the map didn't mention Xi'an road- this was the wrong stop!

Okayokayokay, what are my options- I can always use the instructions written in my notebook to take a taxi to Roosevelt Plaza, so that's the worst case scenario, that's not too bad at all. I could hop back on the subway and give it another go, but come on, I'm not made of yuan. I can see on a map at the subway station that the train sort of curved, so I should be able to follow the road along a similar curve to get where I want to go. Above the main street there was an elevated roadway, one of which ends just past my apartment- it's possible that road will lead me right where I want to go.

Following the road, I hit a fork- do I take the curve now, or go straight for a bit? I saw a smokestack on the straight road, which corresponds to the view outside of my apartment, so I wanted to go away from that- plus, who wants to be near a smokestack? So I took the curve right then, and I ended up walking under a bridge that had zero lights- I had to wonder whether or not that bundle of rags there was a person getting set to pounce and murder me, but it looks like it was just rags. Besides the murder potential, the bridge covering meant this was the one place that didn't have an icy layer threatening to topple me over and smash my beautiful face. Which was a big plus.

Ahead was a sign pointing to "Metro"... I wasn't 100% sure whether it was pointing back where I came, or if this was the next subway station, the one I should have been travelling to in the first place. I know that sounds dumb, how could I not know for sure which way the sign was pointing? Well, it was kind of pointing in-between, neither direction was a sure thing here, especially with how the road curved. But by now I'd gone a fair distance, so metaphysical signs pointed to yes, this is where I wanted to go.

First I saw the subway stop, and then I saw my apartment building... but I hadn't seen it from the north side before, I didn't really recognize it- turns out on this side at the top of the building it says "Romantic and Trendy City - Dalian". I took a picture and a video.

What I REALLY recognized was the building to me left, it has a purple sign on top that I see from my apartment window all the time, that was what let me know I had made it for sure.

I decide to grab some food at a restaurant before attempting to cross the street to my apartment (I have yet to see the cross walk here turn green here, I don't know what the problem is- it's not a busy intersection, but the visibility around the one corner isn't so good. I'm apprehensive about this corner.) I enter the restaurant and try to ask about taking a seat, but the server wasn't having it with charades, she doesn't speak English so there's no WAY she could communicate with me-- come on, how hard is this, what are the options here, what do people usually ask you when they come to your restaurant? I want a seat, I want some food, I want the bill- that's what we're shooting for here.

Then I try holding my hands together, opening them like a book and pointing at something inside, as though I had a menu. But it looks like they don't have printed menus here, just what's displayed on the far wall- good enough. We walk over to the far wall and examine the options. The first thing I point at, some vegetable looking number, got a head shake. Can't have that. The second thing I pointed at ALSO got a head shake.

So then I see a 19 yuan thing, it looks like some kind of fried egg hash thing- how about that? 

That one was okay.

Then I pointed at a stick of meat for 2 yuan. She raised one finger questioningly, and I responded with three fingers. Three meat things for 6 yuan. Now I was directed to sit down- each table has a metal box with... I don't think it's charcoal, burning charcoal inside is a no-no, correct? I need to ask a camper about this.

Regardless, the technical term is "hot metal fire box". I took a picture of it.

I was given my sticks of meat, and they seemed cooked enough, but I was still confused by the fire box- when a server walked by I tried to ask if I was supposed to cook it some more myself- she didn't understand what I was saying, fair enough, this was a tough one, so I took a stick and took a bite to see if they'd freak out or call an ambulance or something. Looks like it was indeed fit for consumption. 

That being the case, the fire box must purely have been to heat the place up- I'm not at all surprised that I didn't think of that as a reason for its existence until the cooking option was exhausted, as I've noted before, I have a history of not thinking about the temperature properly.

Out came my entre and... it, uh, wasn't egg. It was some kind of fried corn with sprinkles and topped with sugar. I ordered some kind of cake- well, dessert anyways. And it was BIG. I laughed about it at first, ha ha, once again I'd ordered a dessert by accident- but there was so much of it, and it was diabetes on a plate, and I got sick of it so quickly. I felt like a steretypical kid with his broccoli, poking away at my food, begrudingly taking bites every now and again... if today's adventure told you anything, it's that I don't give up easy- but augh, I didn't finish that monstrosity.

I searched my dictionary for the word "sweet", I wanted some commiseration about the whole thing, like "I tried, man, it was too sweet." But when I showed the server "sweet" and then pointed to the phrase "a sweet dish" she said "thank you" and, I thought, a little awkwardly- I think she thought I was flirting. When I told this part to Aiman later he suggested she may have instead seen the phrase "a sweet baby" just above it- but either way, he agreed she took it as flirting. So smooth.

You'd think that would be the end of my adventures for the day, but you'd be wrong- crossing the street, attached to my apartment building there's... something that is always closed when I walk by, with a revolving door and an elephant statue in front. But it was open! What was it? So I walked in, opened my dictionary to "hotel" and asked if it was some kind of hotel- it looked like a lobby. They responded it was a KTV, which is interesting if true, I hadn't been inside a KTV before, but there are KTV's everywhere, and they tend to have "KTV" printed outside the establishment. The guy I was talking to waved at me to follow him, and I thought, hey, a tour of a KTV, or I'll get murdered, exciting either way.

We walked up a staircase, down a hallway, took a right into a dingy area (supporting the murder hypothesis) and down the stairs, popping out an exit that was right beside the entrance to my apartment building at the back. My guide produced a phone that showed me the English "getting tips" (NOW you take that thing out?) and I thought, you want a tip for that? I laughed and grabbed a few bucks, but he turned it down- so if he didn't want a tip, I don't know what that phone was supposed to say. Regardless, he was certainly directing me to avail myself of the housing services of the apartment building where I already rent. Obviously I didn't bother attempting to communicate that, I let him drop me off inside, and after he left I pressed the old digit to the scanner and returned to my apartment.

It wasn't too long before Aiman dropped by, and I told him about my day- he had a lot of good laughs, particularly about that corn cake and "sweet" business.

I should probably work on my post for the day of the 16th itself, but instead, well, I'll do it later. I'm hungry and I already had breakfast. 9:43 am